The Knowhere Guide

The Worst Things in Windsor, Berkshire*

The entirely missable and worth mentioning because of it

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The Worst Things
  • Anyone that goes drinking in Windsor at the weekend. You'll never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. Oh, forgot the twats as well.
  • The tourists!!
  • The above!
  • all the tracksuit-wearing nutters in dedworth - (and the ones who moved to long walk house who thought that if you didn't rob, steal, indulge in a costly heorin habit, shout very loudly and and threaten people with random violence that you were weird)people from the wrong side of the Clarence Road underpass who think they are really smart and clever yet who have low paid jobs or no jobs iat all and who live with a bullet-shaped wife and twenty kids in a slum or a shack
  • the whole of dedworth. the YWCA used to be good and was then filled with nutter criminal mentalists who seemed to think that if you didn't do what they did or wore a tracksuit or were not like them that there was something wrong with you and that you were a freak and a weirdo
  • everyone saying go to the skatepark and not realising its Fucking Shit
  • everyone saying go to the skatepark and not realising its Fucking Shit!!!!
  • Japanese tourists, they get everywhere! Not enough live music. Poncy people trying to be pretentious in poncy wine bars (you know who you are)
  • The big groups of tiny supposed rude boys who think they can do what they like and get away with it, i.e starting on Metal heads etc
  • There are a lot of chiled out and beautiful people in Windsor. Nothing bad there.
  • Pikie's. GET A JOB!
  • The shops - most geared towards tourists(i.e. expensive and full of useless rubbish)
  • The hooray Henries - and there are a lot of them!!!! These people need to appreciate - it's boring to listen to how much your car, mortgage, salary is - oh, and how small minded can you be!!!!!!
  • Pubs close at eleven :(
  • close to slough! traffic is awful, CCTV EVERYWHERE!! lots of squaddies roaming the streets at night.
  • The Queen's your next-door neighbour. The best live music venue ever, The Old Trout was closed and became a shitty Firkin pub. Windsor Arts Centre doesn't even come close.
  • Small mindedness against the tourists by the locals. The amount of townie scum with small town mentality. The lack of cultural mix. Land-rover driving, Tory-voting, farmers with Webbed feet.
  • Too many cafes and hairdressers.
  • Gormless tourist hordes.
  • The Worst thing about Windsor, is that if you fancy a hug and a kiss in the Great Park - be prepared for a gang of Voyeurs creeping up and you. But wait, that is not the worst part - THEY ALL HAVE MOBILE PHONES, AND THEN RING THEIR MATES FOR A 'PARTY IN THE PARK' so to speak!!!!! It's a laugh really, cos they really think that a small shrub will hide them!!!!
  • Traffic, Prices, Planes
  • Lack of Parking, Cost of Parking,
  • tourists traffic low-flying aeroplanes
  • The crowds of tourists on summer weekends, especially Saturday.
  • Traffic can be pretty bad going into town on weekday mornings and leaving town on weekday evenings.
  • Cycle theft is rampant.
  • The worst thing about the place, is the cost. It is so expensive to drink in the pubs and the nightclubs - there are only two and one is for members only and the other is very expensive.
  • Also, apart from The Old Trout which is a very good music venue and makes a good night out, there is not much for the young people of the town. Windsor I feel caters more for the tourists and everything is so expensive, especially around the Summertime - peak tourist season.
  • The odd arsehole Squaddie looking for a fight, as the barracks is nearby.

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All the information in the Knowhere Guide has been contributed by users over the years. No one person is responsible for it all and not all contributors will agree with all the opinions included.

Parts of this information have been supplied by: dave in Windsor, helen, Stacy, Joe Bailey, Richard Hill, Kerry Holdstock, phil, ross savage, Dan Morton, Diane Roscoe, Graham Spoard, sean, Bilal Bhatti, Duke of Nothing, iain, Stu, Mat, Robert Shea, Peter connolly, Mick Sliver, WTG, daz, anonymous, sam, Jack, Twink, generic, Spidlington Spod, Gary, Alex, DONNA, dave, Steve Bond, Mark, Stacey, Jen, Joey Dangerously, Mike Bennett, Kath Hollister, Cooky, CJ, jon young, cli4d, Richard, hannah, Alan Hogg, Tessa Hyams, Simon, Caroline, Ed Waddington, Jamie Ingram, leah weal, anon

Last updated: 2010-06-19

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